Mukbang = Disgusting

It’s come to my attention that I’m not the brightest ๐Ÿ˜†. I had this crazy idea that I’ll write my next blog post when I list everything in our stores. The reality is, I don’t think I’m ever going to catch up with listing everything so… I’m being extremely counterproductive ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ. When I created this blog, the plan wasn’t to post once a month, but apparently, that’s what’s happening. Putting my foot ๐Ÿฆถ down; no more!

There’s a topic I wanted to write about that is probably going to ruffle a lot of feathers and anger many, considering its viral popularity. I’m referring to mukbang. If you’re not acquainted with this term, it originated in South Korea and, from what I understand, it started out with people recording/live-streaming themselves eating a meal. It was a way to help people experiencing loneliness, as it resembled you sitting down with someone to eat and interact with. Now, it’s a whole other monster. These videos have turned into gorge-fests of insane amounts of food.

Unfortunately, these videos are part of my Instagram algorithm, so they show up as recommended for me, but I hope in time they will be filtered out.

My issue with these videos is the ridiculous amount of food waste happening. We are talking about one person eating the amount of food that could feed families, in one sitting. Whether these people actually ingest or just spit it out and edit it is another story, which I’m not diving into, but food waste is food waste. Costs of almost everything, including food, have risen along with shortages, so these people are just adding to the problem.

When I was a kid, my family was poor. We lived in one of the low-income, dangerous areas of the city. Food wasn’t always readily available, and there were times when I was so hungry that I actually ate paper just to stop the pain in my stomach. No, I didn’t have Pica (an eating disorder of consuming non-food items), it was just the only thing within my reach. I only did it a couple times, but that was my reality. So I understand what it means to be without food, as well as to appreciate the food you are given. So when I see these people consume so much, I can’t help but cringe in disgust at their greed. How many hungry people could that have fed? Sure, many mukbangs feature unhealthy food, but when you are starving, those cheesy noodles or that cake could still fill the void and give you energy.

What I would love to see is these people buy these large quantities of food, prepare it, and instead of shovelling it in their faces, distribute it to those who are more in need of it. The human body only needs so much food in it to thrive, so going beyond that is pure gluttony, greed, selfishness, etc. I just can’t fathom these people that do this. I know they do this for views, which turn into money, which honestly makes it double disgustingly greedy.

I know: “It’s their money, they can do what they want.” and that’s 100% true, but this is food we are talking about, sustenance that keeps a human alive. This isn’t using your money to buy a purse, a luxury car, etc. Those aren’t necessities.

It just frustrates me that people are being glorified for wasting food, and more and more people are joining in.

I’m going to say it again. It’s disgusting ๐Ÿคฎ!

๐Ÿค’ Finally joined the Covid Club

Gosh, it’s 3am, and my mind is running in all places, so naturally, I’m wide awake. I’m not too happy with myself that it’s been so long since my last post but, I’m feeling so scatter-brained lately that I don’t feel productive in anything.

Well, the big news is that I’m just finishing up my round with COVID. My boyfriend caught it first, most likely at work when the city was under a blizzard warning and shoppers went crazy stockpiling and coughing all over him (not that much of an exaggeration as he mentioned a guy really did cough on him). So since we live in a small apartment, of course, I wasn’t going to escape it and within a few days, boom, I got it.

It took me about 5 or 6 tests to actually get a positive result, but when I did I felt relieved in a goofy way that I was now a member of the Covid Club. I have to say the first couple of days were by far the worst. My head and eyes hurt, my leg muscles didn’t want to keep me up, and I maxed out at 4 fevers. Also, I got 2 massive cold sores, ones that rivalled the ones I got as a kid from kissing all the animals lol. One of them climbed up the mustache area a bit, so I was really looking like I got into a nasty scrap in the schoolyard. It was terrible!

No, I think the most terrible part was the intense dry hacking cough. No medicine was able to keep it under control. Sometimes I would just hold my breath so air wouldn’t tickle the airways and set off a coughing fit. I did have a moment I couldn’t breathe because the coughing wouldn’t stop… didn’t help I was laughing at myself in the process. Also, because all my muscles were so sore and strained, every time I sneezed it would cause most of my upper body muscles and lower back muscles to burn as if there were being torn apart. The pain would even travel down to my fingertips leaving me crying in pain. It’s rare, but that has happened to me in the past. It took a lot of effort to convince my boyfriend it would go away and that I didn’t need to be taken to the emergency. All in all, I’m mending but I just hope to never go through that again.

About that projected blizzard, which was supposed to be like a “blizzard of the century”… it didn’t happen. Man, I was so disappointed! I love snow! Even school districts closed down their schools in preparation as well as some stores. I was hoping for snowdrifts up the rooftops like we had back in 1997. Oh boy, now THAT was a fun time! The number of tunnels I was able to build… not to brag but, my little legs chiselled out some fine tunnel networks back in the day.

Well anyways, the day it started, my boyfriend had to work and figured I’d end this post showing a couple videos he recorded that day while out in this terrible storm.

๐Ÿ’ธ Money Problems

I am terrible at introductions, so let’s just pretend that I already made an introductory post and carry on.

While I listen to my cat snoring next to me, I wanted to talk about how scared I am regarding our financial situation. I know this is something that doesn’t need to be posted online, but that’s why I created this blog; to share, connect, and relate to others. Plus it’s a great accountability tool, which is something I found I need, as a private journal just doesn’t cut it for me.

Rent is almost due, and for over a year now it hasn’t bothered me all too much because I always had enough put away for it. Well, now that’s beginning to dry up, and I’m looking at living off noodles and fasting to make sure we can pay the bills and feed our kitty. We’ve cancelled all our streaming services; Netflix was terrible and at least we have Disney+ until November of this year.

You see, before this, in my previous relationship, I was a homemaker for several years. When that ended, I had to go back into the workforce, and no matter where I applied, my unemployment gap was the major red flag, even though in the past I’ve held administrative positions in a high-end insurance company. All of my interviewers were women and seemed turned off when I told them I was a full-time homemaker, as if that’s equivalent to playing in the dirt (actually I did that a lot as a little kid). Eventually, with the help of my new boyfriend, I was able to get a part-time retail clerk position at a nearby grocery store where he worked at. I didn’t enjoy it, but getting a paycheck every two weeks, plus seeing my boyfriend at work every day, was a good start; I knew I had to start from the bottom of the ladder again.

Fast forward to six months down the line and during a dermatologist appointment, the manager there wanted to higher me just because our conversation went that I can’t afford a procedure on my minimum wage. She offered to bring me on to assist with clinical trial data entry for $3 more an hour. Naturally I said yes. My retail manager wasn’t too happy because, at that time, a whole bunch of people were leaving.

That’s when the first Covid wave hit and I got sick. To this day, I have no idea if it was Covid or just a really bad cold because I was so weak and had a roller coaster of fevers. My new boss, at the dermatologist, told me I couldn’t start until I got tested and it came back negative. Well at that time, testing was only allowed for people who have travelled or been in contact with people who have travelled. I explained at the hospital that I work in retail, next to the pharmacy, so my chances are really high I did come in contact with someone. They still said no and my boss was furious at the hospital. It took a long time for me to heal, and I wasn’t allowed into the office until every symptom was gone. Because they needed someone right away, I was let go. I quickly went back to my previous retail manager asking to halt my resignation, but she said no, the papers were already sent. Over time I felt she didn’t like me, so this just cemented that. I do kind of see it as, why would she hire me back if there’s a chance I may leave again. But, is that not the nature of retail?

So after many long hours of crying, thinking this was the end of the world, the Canadian government created the CERB which was a benefit for those who lost their job due to Covid in some way. Luckily I qualified and was able to help us stay afloat. Afterwards, I was able to get off that and transition to E.I. (employment insurance) and had that helping us. No, I wasn’t sitting at home doing nothing like many people seem to think about those who benefited from these assistance programs. At the time, jobs were pretty much gone. We were on lockdown and so many businesses were closed and too many people were laid off, meaning more competition in the job pool. Trust me, I was glued to the job boards, LinkedIn, contacting anyone I could for advice, but still nothing.

With my E.I., I was approved to take part-time college courses, so I applied for Library and Information Tech because it would be an absolute dream to work in a library or even archives. ALL. THOSE. BOOKS. FYI, it’s also a little dream of mine to have a little bookstore of my own but… yeah that’s a costly dream.

Now I’m in a position where I can’t afford any more classes due to the benefits being finished, and still no jobs no matter how many I interview for. Last year I applied for a Library Shelver position with the city public library system, and let me tell you, I sprung up when I saw that posting. My resume and cover letter were pristine when I submitted them because I was like “YES! This was the opportunity I needed to get into the field I want!” A couple of months later, they liked my resume and asked me to come in for testing. I aced that no problem. Then I was set up for an interview, and I’m never going to like the coldness of video interviews over in-person ones. Either way, still confident… until the deadline came and I received no verbal offer.

Let me tell you, I was devastated! I already suffer from depression, so with the addition of this, I had some really bad thoughts in my head. I eventually emailed the woman that interviewed me and politely thanked her once again for the interview and asked for any advice on what I can improve on, etc. It took a couple of weeks but she did reply and just said the hiring is ongoing and left it at that. Part of me got a little happy at the thought that maybe I wasn’t rejected and that in time I will be called. But then, what if I end up waiting for a year for this call, but I really was rejected from the beginning?

We tried selling our possessions on Facebook Marketplace, which did start out great, until the number of no-shows and low-ballers became too frustrating that we had to stop. I’m now sending off pretty much my entire book collection to Amazon in hopes there are still avid readers out there, and we opened up an eBay store as well. The problem with our eBay store? CANADA POST SHIPPING FEES! And that fact eBay takes a cut of those fees as well. Ugh, it’s just a constant feeling of being kicked when you’re down.

I think that’s all I wanted to say. I didn’t realize I had this much to write, but the amount of relief I feel at this moment…feels so therapeutic.

Enjoy the rest of your day!

~ J